Readings: Sirach 3:2-6, 12-14; Colossians 3:12-21; Lk. 2:22-40
Not a Perfect Family but a Holy Family
1. Having celebrated the birth of Christ, it is fitting, today to look at the family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. We may be tempted to see this family as being perfect in every way with no experience of the difficulties and problems we have in our families. This is very far from the truth, of course. To learn from this family, we must look at the elements and virtues that would qualify them, not as a perfect but as a holy family. In my opinion, what makes a family holy is being able to navigate through the areas of imperfections that we experienced in their daily life. This morning let me reflect briefly with you on those areas that will help us achieve a life of holiness in our families.
2. There are many reasons why there is no harmony in many families. Can you recall the number of times a week you eat meals together as a family? Even when you do, how many children at dinner table are more interested in their phones than of family discussions? When did you do things together as family this week? Like praying together, having a family time not interrupted by phone calls, alert from Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook. What about having a quiet time to think and pray? When did you read and share from bible last; or reading spiritual books and talking about it at table or praying the rosary together? As parents, can you honestly say that you have been a good role model to them, to the point that you correct them without fearing that they will withdraw love and affection from you? It seems parents have used material things, like, TV, Smartphones, Notebook, I-pad and other gadgets to bribe your children and take away the quality time you should spend together as a family.
3. This is why today’s celebration is so important to us as a family. We must learn from the family of Jesus in Nazareth. To this Pope Paul VI noted among other things: “The home of Nazareth is the school where we begin to understand the life of Jesus – the school of the Gospel. First, then, a lesson of silence. May esteem for silence, that admirable and indispensable condition of mind, revive in us…A lesson on family life. May Nazareth teach us what family life is, its communion of love, its austere and simple beauty, and its sacred and inviolable character… A lesson of work. Nazareth, home of the “Carpenter’s Son,” in you I would choose to understand and proclaim the severe and redeeming law of human work.”
4. We notice with dismay, that our families do not always live up to the ideals of Pope Paul VI. At times our behaviors are similar to those of the Colossian Church which was falling into cracks. Therefore, St Paul responding to them, listed the qualities that must be in a Christian home. He told them to “Put to death the parts of you that are earthly: immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and the greed that is idolatry. Put away anger, fury, malice, slander, and obscene language out of your mouths. Stop lying to one another. Put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another. Over all these put on love. Let the peace of Christ dwell in your hearts. Be thankful. Wives, cherish your husbands. Husbands, love your wives. Children, obey your parents in everything.” (Col. 3:12-21). These are the qualities of a holy family. If these virtues are lacking, family members must work hard to restore them. The point raised by Paul in the reading second and the Gospel is that “Responsibility of family members one to another does not flow only from their natural relationships. It flows also and more profoundly from the special relationship they have to the Lord. When they respond to one another’s needs, they are responding to God’s covenant call to love.” (The Word Alive by Eugene H. Maly)
5. In the Gospel we read of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. This poor family could only afford the offering of the poor. “A pair of turtledoves or two young pigeons.” There was nothing perfect about them. Mary is a virgin and Joseph is not the biological father of Jesus. They are not living in any ideal family setting. They were running away as refugees from Herod to Egypt to prevent the child from being killed. They experienced all the anxieties of a poor family, struggling to make ends meet. I am sure there were times when anger and frustration robbed them of their peace of mind. But this was the family that God chose for his Son to grow up in. This family is holy because it responded to the demand of the word of God as they listened to God. We celebrate today because God created the institution of the family, despite its shortcomings, chose to transform it through the Incarnation and make it one of the ways by which he saved us. We know, from reflecting on the Holy Family that despite all our failures and difficulties, we too are called to become holy by paying attention to God’s word and putting it into practice.
6. Instead of looking at the holy family from the standpoint of Mary being a virgin, Joseph being a saint and Jesus being God’s Son; or looking at the Christmas stable like a glossy house we see in magazines, let us consider it as any normal family. Christ had no pampers, the stable where he was born was constructed for animals and it was crawling with dangerous vermin and foul odors and his first visitors were poor shepherds. Mary and Joseph had to be sick with worry for the infant’s health and well-being. This family did not find everything a bed of roses. Hence, what we celebrate is not the feast of the Perfect Family but the feast of the Holy Family. It would be easy for us to relate to this family that has a lot of semblance with ours. Our family must not be perfect, but it should be holy. This can only happen by us being caring and supportive of one another and by allowing God to be the foundation of our actions. May God bless us and our families during the remaining part of this year into the coming year. Amen.
Rev. Augustine Etemma Inwang, MSP.
